The Last Day of 2008

So 2008 has come to an end and what a year it has been! I have never been a big fan of change, but so much has changed in my life in the past year, actually the past few, but I have talked about those changes before so we'll focus on the now.

I have found some really good people to call true friends this year, people who I can turn to and complain with and who will shake their heads at me, but still love me. They never judge me and they never underestimate me. The funny thing is they have been my friends for a while, but now I can look at them and realize my life would be so different if they weren't around. I have learned to trust them with everything I have. There are three in particular (you know who you are) who have made it possible for me to be where I am right now. That have helped me through tough times, even if I don't always listen. They have and continue to make a difference in my life and isn't that what it's all about...

I have formed an amazing bond with my sister and her family. When I was growing up I wanted more than anything for my sister and I to be best friends and about 10 years ago we finally started getting the bond that is both beyond sister and friends and with everything that has happened this year we have perfected that bond. I know I have helped her out a lot over the past year (past 6 months for sure) but she probably doesn't realize she has given me so much just by making me feel like I belong.
She has let me be a part of her immediate family and makes me feel like I have a role there. She has made it possible for me to bond with my niece and nephew in a way I never thought I would. She has given me a brother who I don't think of like a brother in law, but as a true brother whom I respect and love and who has become a major part of my life and family.

Then there is my older brother and his family. He led me to something I have been missing out on for maybe my whole life. I was always a Christan, I have never faltered on my beliefs, but I never really practiced what I preached. He opened doors for me that allowed me to be a part of a great Christan family and has led me to God in a whole new way. I guess my sister had a part of that two. I never thought you needed to go to a building to have God in your life and I that can be true to an extent, but when you find the right building (or buildings) and worship leaders it can change your whole perspective!

I am always learning from my family and friends trying to take the positives about them and apply them to my life and take the negatives and learn from them. I love that I have a close-nit group of people who I can love and who loves me back. I sometimes for get that, but when looking back I can see just how important they all really are.

There are a few people I didn't mention and they need to know that even though they didn't get a mini-paragraph they mean the world to me and they have had an impact on my life... so if your reading this don't think that I am not thinking about you while thinking over the past year...

So I am ready for 2009, I want to make a lot more changes in my life and continue to grow in myself and in God. I always thought I knew exactly what I wanted out of life, but now I know that I really don't because I am not entirely sure who I am. I know the base of me, but I need to figure out what is right for me in life so I can figure out what I want and need.

So here's to 2008 and a new start in 2009... I know so cliche!

busy busy

So it's been a crazy week with the holidays and work and shopping and just life in general.
I had a great Thanksgiving, although I usually do enjoy the holidays! My family, like everyones, can be a little crazy, but we're all pretty close so I enjoy getting together with them. Makes you realize just how important family really is.
I got the majority of my Christmas shopping done, which was fun and a relief. I never have "too" much to do, but I like getting it done all at once and so far I haven't had any run ins with the crazies who go nuts over black Friday shopping!
I ended up working a lot over my mini break, which isn't necessarily fun, but the money is always nice so I can't complain too much..
I watched a friend get married in a beautiful ceremony and church and may have had a little too much wine at the reception, but that's what receptions are for LOL.
I topped the weekend off by going to church Sunday, I wasn't a huge fan of the service, which is a change for the last few ones I have been to. The guy giving the sermon was a guest at the church and he made his point, but dug it into the ground a little and I felt more like I was sitting in a lecture hall than in church.
The main point he made was one that made me think though. The message was "Guard your Heart" I believe he said that the heart is spoken about over 1000 times in the bible and how so many things effect us emotional that we need to protect our hearts and really make sure about things before doing them. Everything we witness can effect our hearts even if we don't realize it. I'm one of those people who wears her heart on her sleeve and takes a lot of things to heart. I believe easily, fall easily, am easily happy and easily sad. That's right an emotional nutcase :-) It gets me hurt sometimes and makes me learn about life a lot, but in the long run we have to watch what we let into our hearts, because sometimes you can't always mend a broken heart.
He also really talked about porn a lot, which threw me off. I have never been in a church were they go on and on about how much of a sin it is. I think he would have been fine mentioning it, but instead he kept going on and on about it, so I dunno, little thrown off there. I understood his point, but I dunno, strange.
I guess the fact that the main message got me thinking is the point, it gave me something to write about and ponder, and I am starting to realize that that's what it's all about. By attending these services I am able to think about the messages and about what God is capable or doing and what he expects of us. I am able to spread his word, even if it's just here and there.

So anyways... that was my week, I have a feeling the next few weeks are going to be non-stop between holidays, work, family, and friends.

Open Doors

Being a christain allows us to open doors. I am not a preachy person, but I like to talk about religion, at least on some level, which is why I write these blogs.. especially since I started going to church regularly. God wants us to take advantage of open doors, to talk about him and Christinaty and opportunities to help others. Going to church is great and all, but only the people who attend get to hear the message. For a long time I was a "holiday church goer" I just made sure I attended on all the major Holidays and I would show face a few other times a year. My faith never changed, but I wasn't in touch with what church could really do for you, until I started attending the two churched I currently attend. I am taking baby-steps about getting involved, but the ultimate goal is to be more dedicated to God and helping those who need my help. Which is where the opening of doors that my brother spoke about yesterday comes into play.
God wants his word to be spread, and since I am not preachy I have found other outlets to talk about stuff I may not normally talk about. I can share my beliefs with people and let them get to know me better, but I am not forcing it on anyone. If they want to read my blogs here they are.
God has so much love for us and will allow us to put everything on him, which I have said in probably every blog I have written. We just have to want to. He will take our burdens if we let him.
We have been working in the book of revelations the last few weeks visiting various cities and this week we looked at Philidipha, in Turkey, and the city was hit by earthquakes for 4 years straight, pretty much hourly. Jesus told the people he would protect them he would help them if they just believed and followed him. He never said he would stop the earthquakes, but assured the people that if they had a little faith he would get them thru it.
That's how christinaty works. God won't take the bad away, but he will help us deal with it. He will make sure that we are never alone. He will walk by our side as long as we allow him to and we believe and follow.
It's not always easy to be a christian, to follow the rules, to believe in something we can't see, and to trust that "somthing" with everything that's important to us. To live life how he wants us to live it and to follow a book that goes back way before our time. But that's what it's all about. Life isn't easy there are bumps in everyones road, and that's why we need to believe.

Another point in yesterdays service was about how connected we are these days. We have all these websites, phones, and lines of communication. But even with all that people are getting more and more lonely. These lines of communication have allowed us to know what everyone is up to without ever actually talking to them. It also allows us all to gain stocker abalities, which probably isn't a good thing ;-) But seriously, it's sad you know what everyone in your life is doing, but you never have the face to face, you never get the personal contact, and you almost lose the companionship. Don't get me wrong, everyone who knows me knows I am on these sites all the time. I am not knocking them for one minute, but it's still a little sad that these take over as our form of communication.
It seems like people will text, check myspace, or facebook instead of having the face to face conversation.
But the good thing in all this is that no matter how lonely we get, we are never really alone, we still have God to turn to. He will be there no matter what, as long as we let him. He can help us get thru that loneliness, the hurt, the heartache. What ever is bothering us we have to realize we can turn to God and he is beggining us to.

So there are my thoughts and opinions and a little stolen information that I heard at church yesterday. It's really amazing how much a passionate person can make you think about stuff that you may look over in every day life and how they can take stories that happen son long ago and relate it to today. Times and people may change on the outside, but on the inside not as much.

Acceptance

Acceptance –noun 1. the act of taking or receiving something offered. 2. favorable reception; approval; favor. 3. the act of assenting or believing: acceptance of a theory. 4. the fact or state of being accepted or acceptable.

I have found that I do not accept things that I don't want to hear. I try to hang onto my idea of what I want it to be. I have an idea and image of how things should be and if they aren't the way I picture them, I ignore what's right in front of my face. But I am finally realizing, or accepting if you will, that it is what it is.
I can't change things, I have no power in that area. I ask myself and God why it is the way that it is, and I am still waiting for that answer, but I know it will come when he is ready to give it, or maybe when I am ready to listen to it.

I am not always a big fan of change, I like my little world to stay the way it is. Every time I try to change something in my life it just doesn't seem to work out very well for me. Probably because it takes me a while to adjust. There are some changes I welcome and others that I would prefer never happen, but I guess that's common.

My problems and worries are typically so insignificant, but they roll around inside me and I dwell on them, making them worse then they are. It's sort of annoying. When I look at the big picture, does it really matter. What's the point in worrying about yesterday when it's today?

I am good at giving advice and relating to people's problems and insecurities, but when it comes to my own, I cry like a baby and want to crawl into a corner. Why is it so easy to give people advice and help, but not take it and listen to it myself.

Oh the questions we probably all ask ourselves.

So I am working on acceptance and taking things as they are. This doesn't mean I will accept everything that is given to me, it's just not always my nature. But I will work on it. Especially when it's strait forward in black and white.

Putting the Pieces Together

So I like to talk and for me Blogging is a form of talking. I really like to blog about the things that I hear in church (as most of you have probably noticed) This week I went to Christ Church at Mason, like I said last week I will probably rotate between this church and my brothers. Both just offer such a great message so I figure why not right.
So I started to blog earlier about church yesterday and I was at a loss of words. Yesteday during the service I had so much that I could have written about, but because of a busy scheudle I never got around to it (and the internet was down, so I figured I wait til today.) Well When I started to write I just couldn't put what I wanted to say into words and then I got an email from a friend and it triggered what I was thinking about. The email was about Psalm 55:22. It had a story that went with it, but here is the verse. Psalms 55:22 'Cast thy burden upon the Lord, and He shall sustain thee.  He shall never suffer the righteous to be moved.'
This could have been one of the verses used yesterday and if not it fits. Yesterday the service was speaking about how people get frustrated and angry and have thoughts and feelings and they keep them inside, but why do that when you can cast them to God. He is there for us to vent to. If we give him our problems he will carry them for us, he will help us get thru them and help us deal with him. We may not actually see the results right away, but in time the issue gets resolved and if your a believer you know it was resolved because you put faith in God.
There are so many sides to God and what he can and will do for us. We have to be patient, look how patient he is with us. It sort of goes back to what I was talking about last week I think.
I am a true venter, a lot of you know that :-) I pretty much vent to anyone who will listen and believe me that includes God. I get frustrated and I have to go somewhere with it. I am not very good at keeping things bottled up. When I am hurt, upset, happy, overjoyed, everyone knows about it.
God doesn't expect us to carry all of our own baggage, he wants us to confide in him with everything. He wants to carry it for us and help us get thru the tough times and even when it doesn't seem like he is there he is. It could be as complex as a losing someone in your family or something as simple as having a bad day. It doesn't matter how big or small our issues are God is there for us to help bring peace into our lives.
God expects a lot from us and he expects us to expect a lot from him. He is always going to forgive us and be there for us, but we have to let him. If we want peace in our lives we need God in our lives it's that simple. We may not see results right this second, but it's coming. I believe I say it a lot, but the good things in life are worth waiting for and everything happens for a reason. So if your simply frustrated with the bad driver on the road or your angry because you love has left for some reason give the feelings to God, he doesn't expect us to do it alone. When you feel all the pressure give it to God, he wants to be there for us, we have to left him. It's a give and take relationship and God does both so he expects the same from us... at least that's how I look at it.

Perfection

It's Sunday and I made it to church again... I'm getting better at going more often and I discovered that if I had liked the pastor and the message when I was young I would have never had a problem going to church, the getting up early on a Sunday isn't fun, but if you find a good pastor and a good group then you can really get something out of church. I have decided I will be splitting my church time between two churches. The last few blogs I have done about church referred to Mason Church of Christ, which I really like, they always have a good touching message. But My brothers new church is in full swing and they really know how to make the message hit home.
Today Jason did the sermon and he spoke about Revelations Vs 2 8 - 11 I believe. See he does such a good job because he relates it to life (and I may be bias, although I don't think I am) but he always speaks about things that I relate to. Today it was about how God does have a "wrath" I don't think he used that word, but I will. God gets pissed at us, he wants us to be perfect, so he punishes us when we do things that aren't right, he watches over us as we do things that are wrong... but he has too, to make us believe and follow and he will always leads us to the right path, it just sometimes takes detours. There are times when I have to ask why are you doing this to me, why are things like this happening and why can't my life go the way I want it to go. It's because God has a plan for me and it may be different then what I want it to be. He sometimes has to show us the painful things to get us to where he needs and wants us to be. We are sinners, we do bad things and God is trying to show us the right way so sometimes he has to take the long route to get us where were going, so that we have a reason to have faith and believe. If we have faith and believe we'll always get to the place we are meant to be. All of us are going to have times in our lives where we ask why and wonder why it is the way it is. But God does have a point. He knows we aren't perfect, but he wants us to be, so he trys to get us as close to that as possible. It's out jobs to let him and try to live life the best we can, which means trusting him. It's hard sometimes, but who ever said it was supposed to be easy?
We are all going to be challenged every day in our lives and it's time to take the challenge.. he knows we'll mess up, but he'll keep challenging us along the way and when we make the wrong decision he will lead us back to the right path, but we have to learn. So sometimes we're going to get depressed and lonely, and so far down we won't think things will ever change, but that's when it will all come clear and things will start going in the right direction. It's all about having faith and believing. Even the most faithful people have doubts about things in their lives, but that doesn't mean they stop believing. God expects us to have questions, if we didn't how would he ever show us what he wants us to see?
I am no where near where I need to be. I have times of loneliness, depression, and despair and my life is pretty easy and simple, but I still ask questions. I am still waiting and letting God take me where I need to go and it's an on-going process, no matter how "good" we think we are we'll never be perfect so we have to turn to God to get as close to perfect as we can. I make so many mistakes, but I know that no matter what I do God will always love me and lead me, he may let me do stupid things, but in the long run it will teach me and has in so many ways already. Every situation I go thru I have taken something from it and have applied the lesson to life, trying to become a better person. And I will continue to make mistakes and continue to learn and continue to grow.
Sometimes people you are close with are hard on you because they think you can always improve and be better, they push you to do your best and sometimes they come across in a negative way, but they really mean well. Well God is that ultimate someone. He is going to push us harder then anyone or anything we will ever know. He is going to show us the good, the bad, and the ugly to get us to where we need to be. So when times are hard just look at it as a growing experience and put your faith in God because he knows what he is doing. We will get hurt along the way, we'll suffer, we may even lose faith, but God is always right there to pull you back, you just have to be willing to let him. Bad things happen to good people all the time. He'll test us so be prepared to let him. It won't be easy, but when things in life are easy we tend to get bored.. so bring on the challenge!

I try to convey what the messages from church means to me and sometimes I am way off and sometimes I am right on, but lately what is being said really hits close! I am wondering if it's because I am getting older and I am realizing how important church is or if it really is just the person speaking. I think it's a combination of both, but how the message is delivered makes such a huge difference. If your interested in listening to the sermon they are on Podcast on ITunes, I'm not sure what it's under, but the name of my brothers church is Legend Community Church... They are small and just getting started, but the messages they are talking about really can hit home if you listen!

Nosey vs Interested

I am starting to think I am too open and expect others to be the same. I don't keep a lot of stuff in and I often refer to myself as an open book. I don't necessarily see anything wrong with that. I look at it as, what's the point in hiding things. Most things aren't that important that no one else can know (sometimes things are better left unsaid, but, for me, 9/10 times not so much). My issue is that not everyone else looks at it that way. A lot of people feel like they have to keep things to themselves even the stupid every day stuff.
I keep feeling like I come across as nosey or annoying, which sucks because I am really just caring and interested. For example when I ask someone how they are or how their day is, it's because I care not because I am trying to get random information. Like I really care about how your day went and what you did, if I didn't most likely I wouldn't ask. Or lets say I am with someone and they get a phone call, I'll say "oh, who was that" and it's not a nosey thing, it's a conversation thing. And I don't ask people this often, there are times when this is appropriate and inappropriate... otherwise it would just be a nosey thing.
Maybe most people really don't care and are just asking to be polite or even nosey.. I guess sometimes people just ask to ask and maybe I do that sometimes too, but for people I am close to or interested in I really am being friendly and really do care to know.
As I've said a million times I am a people pleaser and I am easy to please. I am a go-with-the-flow kind of girl which can also look like a push over, which I will also admit I can be. But what sucks is when I put myself out there and people mis-inturpet who I really am. Maybe I come on too strong or maybe I make myself too available and maybe that's my problem... I dunno... Just something I keep thinking about.
The question is should I just stop asking and caring just stop telling people about me and keeping everyone at an arms length... lol knowing me that will never happen. Maybe I should just back down a step, if people want me to know something they can tell me, no need for me to ask. (except for the people I know are like me and who like to share or like to asked(-:...)
hmmm... I dunno just something on my mind, that leads to other thoughts for another day...

just updating

So the past few weeks have been filled with busi-ness which is weird because I am usually looking for something to do, but the past few weeks it seems to be finding me. I bought a car, saw my brother start a church, got a 3rd job, keeping up with work and working out,spending time with my niece and nephews, and making sure I still have a life. It may not sound like a lot, but it seems like I am always on the run, but I won't complain.. I'll just get used to a little less sleep and thank God I have DVR :-)

The biggest thing was the new car, which I am so excited about! It's a Ford Escape 2008, new... I finally got rid of the yellow caviler, which is almost sad.. It was the first car I bought on my own and it was COMPLETELY paid off, but I think I was/am ready for a mature less yellow car, not sure how ready I am for the payments, but it'll be good.

The Irish pub, Dingle House, is finally opening for all of you who know about it. I am going to be helping out there Wednesday and Friday nights(serving), so feel free to come up and see us, try some beer and/or food. I think we have like 65 bottles and like 20 on tap so it will be a lot of new things for everyone to try... and the food is so good! Plus u should see our uniforms!
It's been a long haul for a few of my friends who own it, but the pub is so cool looking and I am excited about serving again (which I NEVER thought I would say) I guess it's different when your working for friends and have seen their idea turn into reality.
So here goes, Friday marks the day I start my THIRD job, am I crazy or just bored... hmmm... There's something to think about.. I guess if it's boredom it won't last much longer!!

Oh and on a completely different note, my brother in law has a scan of his tumor a few weeks ago and it has shrunk a siginifant amount! Which is such good news!!! He has 3 chemo treatments left and then like a month of radiation... everyone keep your fingers crossed on that!!

So a quick overview/update for anyone who wanted to know:)

Recap

What a week it has been! It's sort of crazy to go without electric, it really makes u appericiate the small things that are typically taken for granted! And it really makes you feel for the states/people who REALLY got hit by the hurricane! I personally only went without, at home, for two days, so I guess I was on the good end of it, but I know people who still don't have it out. And it say the least it's a pain.

On a positive note, it did extend my vacation for a day and 1/2 so I won't complain too much, I love the people I work with but it was nice having the extra time off! And now it's back to reality!

We have been back to work for 3 days and it's just been a strange week, I am completely out of my routine (for 2 weeks now) and I am not one who enjoys being out of her routine!

I participated in Light The Night last night and the walk went very well! I was excited Jen and Dan got to come, since it directly affects them. I raised $400 for it and I was really excited about that! Thanks to everyone who helped!! Jen and I have already decided we are going to have our own team next year, find some sponsers, get some team shirts.. so I guess that's a forwarning for next year :-)
The speakers last night were moving, especilly the grandpa, his granddaughter is currently in remission, she is 4. It's just so crazy to see these little kids with cancer, after seeing what my brother in law has gone thru it makes me wonder how they handle it being so young.
I just have so much respect for everyone who has dealt with this illness/disease! It just completely wipes you out and so many people are affected by it! It felt good to be able to help out even if it was just a little bit. We're hoping next year we can do even more!!

So here we are back to another weekend... man do the weeks fly by!

1st Vacation in 2 years

So I haven't taken a real vacation since I started at Flexstaff... UNTIL NOW... The first 2 years I was there I have just taken long weekends so I decided it was time to take some time off!! I am not going anywhere and u know it's refreshing!! I kept thinking to myself what am I going to do with 9 days to myself!!
So far I have gone to a Reds game, gone shopping, slept, gone to the zoo, changed my hair, caught up with old friends, hung out with family and friends... and it's only Tuesday. My house should be spotless by Sunday night, but I won't promise that, it will at least be straightened! But I am enjoying it. I know come Monday I will be like seriously, is it over, but I am enjoying the chill relaxing time I have!
Who said you need to go somewhere for a vacation. I guess for the past 2 years I thought that so I just never really took much time. But we all need a little break now and again, even when the job isn't all that hard! So here I am sitting with my dog thinking about a glass of wine and figuring what the hell... I don't have to work tomorrow WHY NOT!!! (any of u who are reading this and know me, understand that I typically don't drink during the work week, so a glass of wine on a "work night" would be a change for me!!)

So heres to the rest of my vacation (and hopefully i will be taking a few more long weekends in the next few months!)

Song Lyrics

I always hear these songs and they hit way to close to home, so I figured I would post the lyrics... and u'll see what I mean (any of u that really know me that is)I may have taken out a line that doesn't fit, but the rest is all too real LOL...


"Where I Stood" - Missy Higgins

I don't know what I've done Or if I like what I've begun But something told me to run
And honey you know me it's ALL or NONE

There were sounds in my head Little voices whispering That I should go and this should end Oh and I found myself listening

'Cos I dont know who I am, who I am without you All I know is that I should And I don't know if I could stand another hand upon you All I know is that I should

See I thought love was black and white That it was wrong or it was right But you ain't leaving without a fight And I think I am just as torn inside


And I won't be far from where you are if ever you should call You meant more to me than anyone I ever loved at all But you taught me how to trust myself and so I say to you This is what I have to do


I could do this to like 8/10 songs that I hear, find the meaning(at least how I hear it) and how they relate to me(in my opinion), but I guess that's what music is all about! :-)

Lots of thoughts

So I have come to the conclusion that I love too much and I forgive to easily. I am one of these people who wears her heart of her sleeve, I will tell everyone pretty much anything they want to know about me and I am a very giving person. I have spent 95% of my life trying to make everyone else happy. I am a true people pleaser and I have a tendency to put everyone else's needs over my own. It's just who I am and how I work. I am not complaining about it, it is what it is. The problem is some people take advantage of it, sometimes without even knowing their doing so(at least I let myself think that). The funny thing is I know they are doing it, but I let them. I just want all the people that I care about to be happy, it's in turn what makes me happy. But every now and again, it knocks me in the head, because when will things start to go the way I have always dreamed they would go. I am a fairly patient person (at least when it comes to some things) and I don't really "expect" anything from anyone, but sometimes I just wonder when it will be my turn.
Now don't get me wrong, I am not whining here, I have been blessed with great things in my life and I wouldn't change my life (at least most parts of it) But every now and again I want it to be my turn. As I write that I think, gees Mel, u sound selfish.
I've always told myself if you are upfront and honest with people, love with all your heart, are there for all the people that matter, then it will pay off in the end. You will have contributed to the happiness of everyone you love, you will have made a difference. But do I make a difference or am I just that push over that people end up feeling sorry for. And if I am that push over am I willing to just deal with that, because I made that decision somewhere along the line. I am not always a push over but I to those who are close to me I tend to be! UGH...
So do I deal with it and not change or do just change and wipe the slate clean and pull myself out of the push over status I've given myself... hmmm something to think about!

Mr Leo

So My nephew turned one last week and my brother and sister in law had his HUGE birthday party this weekend. The little guy just amazes me, he came to us last year about 8 weeks early and wasn't quite ready to come out. He was in the hospital until almost his original due date. So to see him now running around and getting into things is just great!
I call him a little guy, but he is quite a chunk (which will probably go away now that he can walk) but he is all the cuter for it! Gotta love a little baby fat when they are that young :-)
My older brother does these amazing videos for him, which are on various website and he tracks Leo's first year. My sister in law needs props for the scrapbooks she put together because those too are great! (It must be a family thing, the scrapbooks because my sister and myself also spend a lot of time making excellent scrapbooks, when there is time).
But I look at my nephews and my niece and I think how great it will be when they are older and can look back and see how much love they have in their family. All of us want to do so much for them and everyone knows they love looking back and seeing how things were when they were little.
So anyways just wanted to give a birthday shoutout to Leo and give some props for the birthday party.
I have to admit my siblings do know how to throw parties for their little ones. They both have had partys with like 70+ people and their kids are all under 3 LOL. I don't even know enough people to have parties like that and I'm 25... hmmm maybe that's a sad reality haha.

Caleb The Faithful

So I am currently getting better about going to church, I have been randomly going with my sister and brother in law for the past few months and I have made it the last two Sundays, my problem is getting up early and making it there, but when I go I always get so much out of it.

It's sort of refreshing to go to church and really feel the message hit home and see how it relates to every day life and people. I grew up in a church that was a little more traditional and that's great for some people but for me I can't focus. So since I started going to christ church at mason I just really can take something out of it.

Yesterdays service was speaking about doing things wholeheartedly and having/being faitful. We tend to do things when we want too and when they are convienent for us. That's how society is and we are all a product of that. Not to say it makes anyone a bad person, but I don't think it's how God really intended for it to be.

The service was about Caleb, who had been made a promise by God to recieve land, Caleb waited for 45 years to recieve it and he was never impatient or angry that he hadn't received it earlier, he was just gratedul that he got it at all. He was completely 100% devoted to God and he knew if God promised it to him he would receive it. He had all his faith in God and that never changed. How many people can truely say that. How many of us are willing to wait 45 years to get something. In todays society I don't think many of us are willing to do that. We want everything yesterday, I know I am like that more often then not. The other amazing thing about Caleb is that after waiting all this time for this land and gifts from God he gave the best part of it to his daughter, just because she asked for it. He was a person that lived for everyone else, at least thats how it appears to me, from the bits of scripture I heard. But could you imagine how self fulfilling that could be, to do so much for God and the people you love. To wait your whole life for something just to give it away. To be so full of faith that the wait doesn't matter.
I do try to put all my faith into God and to wait and see what my life will bring and it's hard. I am like everyone else, I want to know what's going to happen now, I want things now. But the wait can make things more gratifying. The good things in life are worth waiting for and if you truely do put your faith in God you will be rewarded for it (even if you have to wait).

I take these sermons and talk about what I think, everyone probably gets a different message (along the same lines) but they always make me want to be a better person and that's easier said then done, but who said things we're supposed to be easy. It takes work and in the end it will be worth it.

Light The Night

So I am walking for a fun-raiser for cancer, in honor of my brother in law, in September. Light The Night is the fund raiser, I believe they have two walks and I am doing the one at Sawyer Point in Cincinnati. I have a donation page listed below if there is anyone who would like to pledge, I also have the email I sent out to friends and family to get donations for the cause. I am encouraging people to walk or donate because it's a great cause. So many people are affected by cancer.
I help out as much as I can with Jen (my sister), Danny (my brother in law) and Julia & Matthew (my niece-2 1/2 and nephew - 4 weeks). This is such a rough time on them, Danny's chemo treatments are every other Thursday and it pretty much wipes him out. It's starting to take it's toll on him, he is tired most of the time and sick to his stomach. He is still working 40 to 50 hours a week and trying to help out as much as he can with the babies. I can only help them out at home so much, so I figure if I am able to raise money for the cancer he has then I will be helping him and everyone else who is affected just a little more.
If anyone is interested in helping out just go to the website below and sign up or make a donation. It really is for a good cause!


The Email:
http://www.active.com/donate/ltnCincin/2392_mwilcoxon

I have a fundraising sight for anyone who is interested in making a donation. Every little bit helps. My goal is small because I would like to exceed it. If you are interested in making a donation just go to the link above and pledge what you can. If you would like to sign up and start your own fund raising go to:
http://teams.lightthenight.org/CintasAccounting
click on the Cintas link, go to the 3rd line down, Lisa Yerian and join the team. I am walking in Honor of my brother in law.

Feel free to send this email out to friends and family!

Current Work and what I would rather be doing

So I keep thinking maybe I should have gone into education or photography while I was in college instead of communication. My job isn't bad, but it isn't something I want to do for the rest of my life. I stay because I love my co-workers. In my office there are only 3 of us, me, another recruiter, and our boss. His dad is in semi-retirement and when that happens my boss will take over the company. The two people I work with are two of my best friends, because lets face it I see them more then I see anyone else and it's such a small company that things tend to be very casual and laid back. They are the reason I stay here.

My whole life I wanted to be a teacher or photographer, I took photography classes in both high school and college and anyone who knows me knows I am obsessed with my pictures. But for some reason I can't bring myself to try and turn the hobby into a career, I'm young so I keep saying maybe some day! I keep looking into teaching, but for some reason can't get myself to go for it. I even consider day care. I love kids, teaching has about the best hours, but I just don't want to go back to school and I'm not sure if I have the confidence for it. I have confidence, but since that's a new territory I'm just unsure.

So I stay where I am because of my co-workers and my job is cake, but I would like something a little more challenging and with opportunity for growth. Hmmm... I guess we'll see what happens!

The New Baby

So my nephew was born yesterday at 3:44pm, weighing 8lbs 12oz, my sister was supposed to be induced on the 3rd, but the hospital was too busy, so she went in on the 6th instead, he was a little over a week early and thank goodness she went when she did, my sister is a small person and that's a big boy!! His name is Matthew Clyne. His big sister Julia isn't quite sure what to think, but she'll get used to the idea of little brother, since he isn't going anywhere she'll have too.

It was a REALLY busy weekend, but good things came out of it!

June

So June has been busy! Has a few grad parties to attend, a work outting thrown in the mix, time to help out with the family when needed, turned 25, and planned a few weddings.
So the birthday, BIG 25 went well, I don't feel any different, but I never have felt my age. Age is just a number anyways, it's all about how you feel, and hopefully that's not old :-)
I planned two weddings last week and let me tell you that was CRAZY!!! The first wedding was on a Thursday, which threw me off, thank goodness my boss let me take off when I needed to for those. The Thursday wedding had about 50 guest, there were 5 bridesmaids, 3 groomsmen, and a flowergirl and ringbear. It went well, but leading up to it was like pulling teeth, I just do the ceremony part, typically, but it takes more planning then you think. It can get a little stressful, but it's usually pretty fun.
The Saturday wedding was HUGE, one of the pastor's called it a galla and that fits! There were between 250 and 350 guests, 350 were invited, I didn't count to see how many showed. There were 11 groomsmen, 1/2 of which I knew, 7 bridemaids, two pastors, a bagpipe player, organist, soloist, and scripture readings. And it couldn't have gone smoother, I had my best friend assist me with the wedding, because with that many people I would have wanted to pull my hair out afterwords. We got an invite to the reception and it was probably one of the funnist(that's not a word) weddings I have been to, it was hot since the power was out, but they found a way to make the food and they found a way to get music. There was dancing and drinking and it was a helluva party!
I learned that wedding planners become popular among groomsmen and it becomes essential for the wedding planners to drink and have fun and that's just what we did! It took it's toll by the end of the night, but it was a heckofa way to end June.
This month way crazy and I am excited for July, hoping it is calmer and lighter, but I like to have fun, so bring it on!
I have an exciting few days ahead of me.. my 2nd nephew is going to make his appearence here in the next few days and I can't wait to meet him!!

Family Stuff

So I don't know if I mentioned it in my last blog because I planned on posting some of my myspace blogs, but I'll just re-write or summarize some of them now.
My 27 year old brother in law was diagonised with cancer a few weeks ago and my sister is expecting her 2nd baby any day now. They already have a 2 1/2 year old, so when you add all these things together things tend to get a bit hectic.
My niece, their 2 1/2 year old, also the love of my life, ended up getting sick last week well it got bad the day her dad started chemo and so my sister (8 1/2 months along) sort of had a mini break down. So they think they have it controlled with my niece when my parents end up with it (they watch her every day) and then my sister comes down with it. The goal now is to get everyone well while not letting my brother in law catch it. So I tried to help as much as I could, only to find out Julia (my niece) still has it. It's been almost a week and 1/2 and she can't knock it. So the moral when it rains it pours!

So my sister is trying to care for a sick husband, a sick child, and make sure she stays well and not stressed for the baby. I try and help, but my niece decided yesterday that she doesn't want me around, because when i come around mommy and daddy get downtime which means time away from her and it's just too many changes for a 2 1/2 year old to go thru.
On a positive note Danny (my brother in law) has a hge supportative family, which has both positives and negatives and our family isn't small and again that's both positive and negative. But we're all willing to help and get them thru this. It's just a matter of not getting in the way and not stepping on toes.

We have put things in God's hands and we know he will give us the strength we need, it's just a matter of having a little patients :)

Introduction

So I have decided I like to Blog, I do it on myspace all the time, but my older brother belongs to this site, so I decided to join it as well.
I am by no means a writer, but I do enjoy to write and what's the point if no one will read it. Actually I shouldn't say that, writing does help with venting, but for me I like people to hear what I have to talk about, even if it's completely pointless.
Sometimes I may even make a good point, say something that other people are thinking or maybe things that other people are feeling. I am very opinionated, although I don't speak my mind as often as I should. It seems to come out jumbled when I do and then I end up offending someone, which TYPICALLY isn't my intention.
So here goes, this one is just a short introduction, one of the pointless ones,, but here goes anyways!

I'll post some of the ones from myspace maybe and add some new ones!