Parties

Last weekend I had my bachelorette party and it was a hell of a party, my sister did an amazing job with the help of Kirsten & Lynds and all the attendees who helped to make sure I had an absolute blast. I got out of my bubble and went on stage with a drag queen.. I got to be center of attention, which made me nervous as hell! But it was totally worth it!

This past weekend LB had his bachelor party, this has probably been one of my biggest concerns when it came to the whole wedding ordeal. I am a self concious person and a firm believer if you have to have "one last night of freedom" maybe you shouldn't be getting married. Going out to celebrate with the guys thats another story, but "losing you freedom" isn't a part of getting married... But I am getting away from my point.
I have been worried about what this night (or in Patrick's... and most his friends cases nightS) may bring. I do not like the idea of strippers, plan and simple.. but for some reason I got over it. I thought to myself if you really love this guy and he really loves you (which is obviously the case), you have nothing to worry about. I am so glad I came to that realization.
Before he left I told him I won't get mad, upset, or angry as long as you are 100% honest with me about the whole weekend. I don't need ALL the details, I just need the truth. He gave it to me and I stuck to my word! He called me a few times to tell me how much he loved me and he had an absolute blast throughout the weekend!

So we both had amazing times with our amazing friends and family and now I am even more excited for the next two weeks to get here (if its possible for me to be any more excited... I have been counting down months since we got engaged, weeks since December, and days since February 10th...).

I get to marry my best friend in 13 days, we get to become the "family" we have been "training" to be, so to speak, and we will finally be husband and wife. I honestly can't wait! Every day I fall a little more in love with him.

Update 2012

I forgot my password to my blog and I haven't been on here since I think Pat and I got engaged... now we have 19 days until the wedding! The past 14 1/2 months have FLOWN by... so much has changed and happened so I have to wonder where to start...

We got engaged, I found a dress, we booked a country club, bought a car, found bridemaids dresses, got a photographer,got a new job, picked tuxes, booked the honeymoon, picked flowers, went to Missouri, bought a kitten, had some parties for family, went back to Missouri, had a bridal shower, had some holidays, celebrated one year since our engagement (also known as Christmas), celebrated the new Year, had a couples shower, started the count down until the wedding,Celebrated 3 years of dating, paid off everything we owed for the wedding, had my bachelorette party, and here we are...

It still amazes me every day that I found someone who can love me as much as I love them, who supports me, and lets me be myself. We may bicker like an old married couple, but the love we have for one another is just amazing. We compliment one another and bring the best out in each other.
I can't wait for March 10th to arrive so that we become an "official" family.. We already live and act like a family and like we are married, so this is more or less just a technicality, but it makes it more "real" even if it is just on paper.. it just completes us a little more.
Thinking about the future and what it holds for us is exciting and unknown.. I always had a picture of how life would end up... its fun to see it unfold. Some things are different, but the differences have turned out perfect. God always had a plan and its great to see what he has in store.
So the countdown is on and I have 19 more days until I marry my best friends and become Mrs. Melanie Willis...

Roller Coaster

Crazy and stressful... life has been a roller coaster the past few weeks and I am not a big fan of roller coasters. I mean the idea of them are fun and they have the exciting moments, but in the end I feel sick when I get off.

Well stress and craziness is just like that. You have the exciting and fun stuff and you have the moments where you feel like throwing up.

I like my life, I enjoy the things and people who are in it. I like the daily challenges and when it gets all shaken up, but at the end of the day I like curling up on the couch with a certain someone and not having a care in the world.

The past few weeks I feel like I haven't been enjoying life the way that I should and what its been offering has been too roller-coastery.(I'm probably just being a baby and over-sensitive) It started with a bad situation... then a few good ones... then a few disappointments, then nothing of importance, then a small complication, followed by some more good, then a little more complication... and then the waiting game. Oh the waiting game, this is where I have to wait to see if things will go back to "normal" if there will be a "new" normal or if the roller coaster isn't over.

I think sometimes I just need to vent and I start to feel better. (Thanks to those of you who have listened during this process) But when I look at the big picture, which I try to do often and try not to be a baby and suck it up. Things are pretty good.

The Good:
I have God
I have a fiancée who I am head over heels in love with, who treats me like a princess, and even when he is a big ol' pain in the butt I know I am #1 in his life (even if I pretend other-wise b/c I want to be a brat).
I have a job that pays the bills
I have a house and two dogs
I have "stuff"
I have family and friends who are supportive
I'M GETTING MARRIED IN LESS THEN A YEAR
etc...

I mean for being 27 what else can I ask for @ this point in my life... ok I could answer that w/more "things" but I think I am doing pretty good.

So I guess I just needed to type it all out so I can get over my pity-party and focus on the really good things that are happening in my life:
Two big things: Fulfilling(at least getting some kind of experience) a life long passion and marrying my best friend :-)

The Best Year To Date

2010 was the best year of my life... to date.
A few months back I gave a recap since it had been so long... but I am going to do a mini recap before I get to the main part :-)

We started the year by getting Abby, she was the perfect addition to our little make-shift family. (even though she had a few moments along the way as a terror, over-all she has been a perfect dog). In April we purchased our first house, which couldn't be better for us, we absolutely love it! In September Patrick got his new job, wasn't exactly what he was looking for, but has turned out to be pretty good. And then December got here...

I'll start by saying I have been a NAG for about a year, although most of it was done in a joking manner, I am sure Patrick will vouch that I was a pain :-D I had been bringing up the whole "when will we get engaged" topic. This was a weekly(maybe a few times a week topic) And it wasn't just coming from me... It was coming from friends and family too. The poor guy was getting it from everyone we knew. BUT December 18th @ our 1st annual Christmas party I was talking to some of the girls, one who was recently married herself and went thru the same thing as me. She gave me the advice that I had been trying to follow for the past few months: STOP ASKING... it'll happen when he is ready (There was never a question of if, it was always a question of when). So I told the girls, she is right, I need to stop. They all agreed and I made a promise to drop it and let it happen when he was ready.

So for the next week, I didn't bring it up once. I was SO proud of myself. I am not very good about keeping my mouth shut, but I did! I figured I would be keeping my mouth shut for the next 3 to 7 months. Our 2 year"anniversary" falls in February, so I thought maybe it'll happen then and our birthdays are in June so that was a possibility too. I was NOT expecting Christmas.

So Christmas eve we went out w/some of our siblings, had Christmas eve church and Dinner w/his family and then the family-friends came over and we all hung out until around 12:30 on Christmas eve. I was debating on getting up @ 5 or 6 on Christmas morning (we go to his parents by 7 to open santa and family gifts after opening our own together). I decided to sleep in until 6 (which meant putting a shower on hold). So we get up and we start opening our gifts.

He kept asking me (thru November and December) how many gifts I was getting him, I gave him ball park numbers, he wanted us to be able to open the same amount. Well all of his were wrapped under the tree, so he could see how many he was getting and instead of matching up evenly he went crazy and bought me tons of stuff. We were so excited and opening gifts and having a great Christmas morning. So we finish it all up by 6:40 or 6:45 and I say ok, we should probably head to your parents. He said, we can just hang out for a bit, watching Tom and Jerry.

By 7 I am getting a little anxious because I know his family will be waiting on us. But then he tells me there is still one Christmas gift under the tree. I go and look (knowing there is nothing there) and he laughs because there is nothing there. But he insists that there is one more, so he runs upstairs looking for it, but comes down w/nothing and I don't think anything of it.

So he asks me to grab his computer, he wanted to check something out on Facebook. I am thinking are you crazy, it is 7 in the morning and you can say Merry Christmas from your phone, but I get the computer anyways. He signs onto his account and he says you have to see this. Hands me the computer and tells me to sign into my account.

So I do and I am looking and I ask what am I looking at? He said just hold on a second. He said something will change, but I have a question to ask you first... well by this point it's dawning on me... because what question would he have to ask me at 7 on Christmas morning. (Let me just say, Patrick has probably "asked" me some sort of "question" that sounds like a proposal frequently for the past 2 years. They go something like this "Melanie will you merry Christmas" or "Melanie Wilcoxon will you be my best friend" things along those lines. The difference here was he pulled a ring out of his pocket and said "Melanie will you marry me" and I am a little in shock, when you wait to hear those words for two years your reaction is shock. So I smother him in kisses and say of course I'll marry you! After asking a few times if he is serious. Then I realize he isn't on his knee and he hasn't actually put the ring on my finger. So I say honey of course I will marry you, but you still have to get on a knee and put the ring on my finger. SO he does and he gets more kisses.

It was the best Christmas of my life :-D

I proceed to call my sister (who I wake up even though she has 3 kids) and I call Lyndsey and my mom (both knew he was going to be doing this, mom knew when, Lynds just knew it was coming)

He asked my dad on Thursday, my dad said "no" as a joke and then said, sure, but told him that I told him to say no when Patrick asked. Goof-ball.
His entire family knew and were waiting on us to get there, but knew we would be running a few minutes late.

My beautiful ring is perfect. I had been sending him pictures of what I wanted and he kept those in mind, but came up with the perfect ring for me. It's a solitaire, round, with 4 diamond chips on each side. The main stone was his great aunts and was a coal-miners diamond. All I really wanted was shine and clarity and he nailed it.

So March 10th 2012 I will marry my best friend, the love of my life, and my whole future. So 2010 is a year that will always be remembered and will take a lot to top.

Happiness is a mood...

"Happiness is a mood not a destination".. yes I stole this quote and from One Tree Hill of all TV shows :-) but think about it, it really makes sense and hits home. We all want happiness and strive to be happy. We look to other people, places, and things, but happiness comes from within. It can come just as quickly as it can go and sometimes the goal in life seems to be to get it back, which isn't such a bad goal. But are you able to get it back if your not truly happy with yourself first, once you find the person, place or things that you feel make you happy, will you stay happy if your not happy with yourself?

Our moods change every day and sometimes even minute to minute, but looking at the over all picture should be how you define if you really are happy or not. Put side the little things that change the day to day mood and look over your life and see how it's gone, weigh the pros and cons and that's how happiness should be defined, at least in my book. When you have a positive outlook you have a positive mood and there you've got it, happiness.

People, places, and things can have an effect on overall happiness, but you and your mood define it.

Generally

We all make mistakes in life, you know when your an adult when you can pick yourself back up and change your life. You have to turn to God, grow up a little and follow your heart. Life isn't supposed to be easy, if it was things would get boring. You just have to remember you have friends and family to fall back on, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't take responsibility.

I have learned that people lie, cheat, and steal to get where they want to be in life and who does that benefit in the end? It eventually all comes back to bite them in the butt. But it's never to late to change, to grow up, and to be the person you really want to be in life.

I have always believed that people are generally "good", I make them prove otherwise. It takes a lot for me to believe they are really "bad". They may be annoying, dishonest, and fake, but not "bad".

I know I judge and I know God teaches us not to judge, so maybe I am no better then anyone else. But at the end of the day I am who I am and what you see is what you get. I think God forgives, if you ask for forgiveness and believe and are truly sorry or truly want to change then God will be there for you.
I may always be judgemental to an extent and I know I will never be perfect, but I know that in the end I know whats important in life. I know people won't always agree with me and may not like what I have to say, how I feel, or what I think, but it is what it is. I think I am generally a good and forgiving person.

We all have faults and no one will ever be perfect, but we all need to strive to be "good" and live a happy and healthy life. It won't be easy, but in the end... it will be worth it.

10 months later

So I haven't written since 2009, and it's October of 2010, to be honest I don't know where the past year has gone.
In January we bought a puppy together, Abby, she has been a great addition to our little "family". In February we celebrated our "one year anniversary" I sometimes feel silly celebrating "dating anniversaries" but it was a great night. Patrick got me a new camera I made him a photo book we went to dinner @ The Cheesecake factory (which was the place I realized I was falling for him, the year before). It ended up being a great night.
In March we found the house we would call our first home. We signed the papers on April 9th and started the "moving process" that night. We called all our friends who came over to help us paint the entire house. I don't think either of us will pick up a paint brush for a long time! We bought some new furniture and carpet and we moved in the following weekend. 6 months later and the place feels like home! With a lot of little touches along the way we have really started to make it ours. Our "future" projects are a fenced in back yard for the dogs, clearing out some brush to make a bigger back yard, adding a front porch, and finishing the basement. All things that won't happen for a while, but there will come a day.
My 4th nephew, Ethan David was also born in March.
Patrick was playing football for the Cincinnati Commandos, He only was able to play in a few games before he broke his arm in two places. That was great for our move, well actually it happened about a week after we moved all our stuff in.
In June we went to Virginia with the Willis clan and it was a great family vacation. I met Pat's grandparents and got to know them a little. We went to an amusement park and I rode a few roller coasters, I hadn't done that since 2001! We got to visit Jamestown, a winery, and the ocean!
Most of our summer was about running around and getting the house put together. It was a hot summer but that didn't stop us!
Patrick started a new job in September, it is a completely different field and it's a lot more physical work then before, but so far he seems to be good with it. Its made home ownership a lot easier. The downside is he has to get up @ 4:45am and goes to sleep by like 9.. but he is home by like 3. The dogs get to spend more time with him, so I am sure that is a plus for all involved!
Abby is almost a year old and a few weeks ago decided she likes to dig wholes in the kitchen and laundry room floor. Patrick got to see my floor replacement skills after that little incident. To be honest I got to figure out that I had floor replacement skills and thank God there was material left in the basement!!
The next few months will prove to be super busy. I have a wedding to attend this weekend while Patrick will be in NC for a bachelor party, we have a Halloween party coming up, our annual mini G-Burg vacation, another wedding, and then we get into Holiday season! I am excited for the start of 2011 because my work hours will change and it's going to be awesome!!!
So that's a short summary of the past 10 months. It has flow right on by and life is good. I am living with and will eventually marry (once he asks and we can start planning) my best friend. We have so much fun and I fall more in love with him every day!

The one thing I have gotten away from in the past year is church. My faith hasn't changed or faltered at all, in fact its more intact then ever, but I do miss going to church on Sunday's. My problem now is not having that church home. I still have the options that I had before, but distant is my current problem. The new house is a little further then before and I want a church to call home that is in this area and to be honest I have been lazy about it.
I know God is still a huge part of my life and affects all my decisions. So @ least I still know he is here and having a part in every day life, next step is to just find that church home again or just suck it up and drive the extra 15 to 20 minutes to go back to the churches I love. That should be an easy choice huh :-)

So anyways I need to start getting back on here more often and keeping up the "journal of my life"

lil update

Wow it has been such a long time since I wrote anything on here and tonight, while Patrick is asleep by 8:30 because he isn't feeling well, I figured it's a great time to write a new one!
So life has just been crazy the past few months, fast paced and non stop! But not in a bad way. We(Patrick and I) have now been in the apartment 4 going on 5 months, which means we have to start looking at houses again soon... uck. But we turned our little place into a temporary home, and really what more could we ask for! It's perfect for the two of us (plus Lucy) it'll work.
We had a FANTASTIC mini vacation almost 2 months ago.. I couldn't have asked for a more amazing trip. The weather was in the upper 50's to 70's and sunny the entire time, Patrick realized how much he loves Gatlinburg and has been planning our next trip since we got back LOL. Such a perfect weekend getaway when your on a budget haha.
As soon as we got back the Holidays hit!
Thanksgiving was great with friends and family (and wine of course) We got addicted to Wii and Mario Brothers! Our family are very similar and live very close so we can easily bounce back and forth between them and make sure we get to see and spend time with everyone.
This year has just been so much fun for us because it is full of firsts and gives us a peek into what life is going to be like down the road.. well the easy version of it haha. It amazes me a little each day just how much I love him and life in general. It's exciting to see what else God has in store for me and what the next step will be. Part of me wants to rush on and see what is next while another part of me wants to step back and just enjoy what is going on around me. (the second part is more difficult to do because life happens so fast)
We just celebrated our 1st Christmas together and it couldn't have been more perfect. We(I) got up at 5:30 on Christmas morning, let him sleep until 6.. so we could open presents.. it was like I was a kid again.. than the rest of the day was spent with family and it was great. I loved being a part of his traditions and seeing what my holidays will be like in the future.. I actually got to sit back and see how excited and happy everyone was... it was just plain ol nice :-)
Santa was very good to us this year, and it couldn't have been at a better time!! I don't have much in the way of money and things, but when it comes to family and love, I have more than anyone could hope for! That probably sounds a little sappy, but tis what tis.
2010 starts on Friday and I have to ask where did the past 10 years go! Life is just so different than it was and so different (in a good way) than I ever thought it would be. When your growing up you always have a plan, at least I always did and some things have fallen into place, but I don't know if I imagined life like it is.. jsut goes to show you can't plan everything and your plan may be similar to God's but in the end you just have to sit back and enjoy the ride and let it be what it is. I tend to worry (about pretty much everything, we all have flaws) but just when I think I am going to hit rock bottom, something happens and life turns in the way that I needed it to. Nothing will ever be perfect, and I've said it before, how boring would it be if it was, but when I look at the big picture it's pretty close in my book.

I am starting to get the "when is the ring coming question" .. actaully who am I kidding we have both been getting it since like March (when Patrick decided we would get married) and you know.. I have NO CLUE LOL.. I know we love each other, I know I will marry him, and I know when it happens it happens... God knows, Patrick may have an idea, and for all I know the whole world, but me, knows... but it's not important because when it's time I'll get the memo... I hope ;-) But I do know that it's a great feeling to know that someone loves you as much as you love them and is totally in love with you.

So my little update... life is good, life stays busy, I am completely in love, and right now I wouldn't ask for anything more.